Now Available...

I'm blessed to announce that Hug Life is available for Google Play, Kindle, and Nook! 

Hug Life is the daily blog put into book form as my daughter and I walked through her brain cancer.  She's my hero and I want everyone to read about her!

Written from my perspective as a mother and caregiver my prayer is that this book will bring life to the reader and encourage their heart.

Salvation

I woke up this morning thinking about the process of salvation in my life. My thoughts were of this house of a body I live in and how when I welcomed Jesus in all I could see was his wonderful light flooding my barren walls. The warmth and love from him was overwhelming, my whole being was flooded with peace.

People around me must have thought me crazy because I remember for the first time in my short life (I was 15) I was peaceful, quiet and still.  I was truly in awe and yet I wasn't fully aware of what happened to me...all I knew was suddenly the wind and waves inside were calm and still.

Life went on as it always does and unknowingly I went my own way, somehow I didn't put together the things they spoke of in church with my new found calm. I had grown up in the church but it all just seemed to swirl around me like a smoke filled haze.

Then one day it was like God flipped on the light in a dark room and the cleansing began. Now by his light I could see all the boxes and cobwebs stacked and piled strung from here to there. God was with me as we began ever so slowly to open box after box. Some of them were so gruesome that all I could do was weep and say, "Please, Lord, deal with this one for me."

Gently he would come along side me with his word and his presence and walk me through the process and then other times he would make me deal with the boxes myself always standing or sitting nearby, never leaving or forsaking me.

This salvation process the world can never understand. It isn't that we accept Christ as our Savior and then instantly our lives are perfect...quite the contrary now we must deal with the things we have stacked and piled that trip us up. Things we weren't even aware were there...we couldn't see them before his light came.

I understand why the world would say, "There is no God," because then they would have to see things about themselves that need to be cleared away. John 3:19 says, "...Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God."

God's whole purpose in exposing the darkness in me is to fill me with more of his glorious light so that he can shine his light through me and bring other people to inner peace and give them the gift of his salvation.

He wants to calm the storm in you and clear away the dust and burdens of old boxes of junk that life heaps upon us or that we collect. If those things are cleared away, we can live at peace with God and ourselves no matter how crazy this world gets.

Don't be afraid...come to the Light of Jesus and he will change your life. Ask him to show you that he's real and invite him into your very being, confess to him the darkness in your life and you will receive his peace and his love.

Quiet Life

Life can be so quiet, so mundane; every morning we trudge off to work and every evening is the same; We lovingly discuss the day, what was good and what was bad, then we eat and go for a walk... by the way this is my favorite time of the day.

Some TV, some popcorn, then off to bed we go to start the whole cycle over again; Every day I have my ears to the news and my eyes on the skies, when are you coming Lord, this world gets darker by the minute.
I look at the pristine skies and the lush tropical foliage; I watch the lizards play and think is this for real? How can it be so bad in other parts of the world and yet so calm and peaceful in mine?

When is the next big thing going to hit? I know I must sound rather grim and pessimistic but isn't that a part of life as well? We have the good and those things that challenge us as God grows us up into him.
I'm grateful for the quiet life. I'm grateful for mundane because I'm convinced if there was no mundane we wouldn't learn how to commune with the Father on a deeper level.

It takes a lot more effort to be intimate with Him in the calm than in the storm.

OH, THAT PESKY TONGUE!

The other day a friend and I were talking about the power of the tongue. For most of the morning, she had been putting herself down until I asked her this question, “Do you think we can speak something into existence?” As I posed the question several scriptures began to flood my heart.



“How did God create the universe in Genesis?” was my next question. Several times in the first few chapters of Genesis it says…. "God said" and then it happened. If we are created in God’s image as Gen 126-27 tells us, do we have the same creative power within our mouths? Certainly not to the extent that God has for the word “image” in the Hebrew means a representative figure or phantom.


But there are many scriptures throughout the book of Proverbs that deal with the creative power of the tongue. It has the power to bring forth wisdom or folly (see proverbs 10:20, 31, 15:2), it can bring health (proverbs 12:18), it is a “tree of life” (prov15:4), it can break a bone as proverbs 25:15 tells us and there are many more.


Proverbs 18:21 says, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.” Wow, that sounds like creative power to me!


Years ago the Lord revealed to me that when I spoke negatively about myself I was agreeing with the enemy and his plans for me. Negative thoughts would be in my mind and the minute they would come out of my mouth I would “eat the fruit thereof” in the form of beliefs about myself. These beliefs then created a stronghold from which the enemy could navigate through my spirit to hold me captive.


When the Lord revealed this to me I began to strictly monitor what I was saying about myself. I wanted to agree with what God saw in me and not the condemning voice of the enemy of my soul! I was amazed at how my life began to change when I stopped speaking “death” to myself and began to speak “life” instead. Remarkable the difference!


I think one that the enemy frequently used on me and on a lot of women is….I’m so fat….ewww that sneaky devil! This one was deeply imbedded in my brain. The Lord delivered me from this one when I saw that my little daughters were learning about their bodies from what mommy said about hers….ouch! That revelation stopped me cold in my tracks! I learned to shut my mouth from then on.


My friend and I also talked about how to recognize condemnation from conviction and how condemnation puts you down, “you’re nothing, you’re fat, you’re stupid, you’re slow…etc.” These are the red flag words of condemnation but it can be more subtle such as… “I could never do that or I’m not qualified to do such and such.” These kept me bound until I learned not to speak such things and rely upon my God who was capable of giving me all I needed in every situation, to do what he had called me to do!


Conviction draws us to God in repentance as we see that we have sinned and have a fear of our almighty and powerful God. God’s convictions pierce our hearts as we see him nailed to the tree and recognize that we were to share in the blame of his crucifixion because our sins put him there and our hearts break.

When we are convicted, it is in the form of confession and repentance that we are forgiven and freed from the sin creating growth in us and cleansing for us.


In the end, our hearts were encouraged and we were strengthened by our conversation. It was good of the Holy Spirit to remind us and warn us. God’s love had prevailed!

LET IT BURN!

Recently I was reprimanded for an outburst of anger. All my life I have dealt with these wrathful outbursts in one way or another. Sunday we were challenged to be a living sacrifice…but I confess I’m not sure what that fully means until now. We were encouraged by our brother to stay on the alter and allow God to deal with the thing he puts his finger on in our lives.


Galatians 5 talks of walking in the Spirit and having freedom in Christ. I won’t candy coat my sin by saying I have struggled or I am struggling for Galatians 5:19 clearly denotes “fits of rage” as an “act of the sinful nature” and furthermore goes on to state that “those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.”


In asking for wisdom, knowledge and understanding about this thing which God has pointed out, I have come to the conclusion that I can look at this situation one of two ways. 1. I can be offended and let my foolish pride step in effectively blocking the work of the Spirit which in turn would allow me to stay as I am trapped in my sin and unable to inherit the kingdom of God or...

2. I can determine to lay on the alter still and quiet and allow the Spirit to remove this blemish from my soul, gain a victory and learn to actually be affective in my spiritual walk with Christ.

“Let it burn! Let your flesh burn on that alter!” my trusted friend EJ would say.


I confess the temptation is strong to do the first option, however I choose the second option because my life is no more my own and I don’t want my testimony to be tainted but pure. This is the true gospel to pick up ones cross and actually follow after Jesus. A time is coming when the sheep will be separated from the goats and I don’t want to be found with the stubborn goats :)!


Perhaps, if I am enabled by the Spirit of God to have victory this time by surrendering to the discipline of the Father, which by the way only means he loves me because he only disciplines those he loves, then maybe I will walk in a greater relationship with him.


But what do I do? What is my part? As I wrestled with these questions the other day my sweet husband, not knowing of my thoughts, began to sing a song “…at the cross you beckon me, draw me gently to my knees and I am lost for words, so lost in love I’m sweetly broken, wholly surrendered.”

I cried. God is so good.

So many times I have seen surrendering myself at the foot of the cross as an intimidating thing because it means I am totally helpless to do it myself. Pride dies there…completely. But recently, I have begun to view surrender at the cross as the narrow road or gate that leads to freedom. To be broken before him is sweet but painful at the same time.


What do I want? To walk in the Spirit, live by faith and please God or please myself and stay the way I am? Time is short…Father, I want to be really real, I want to be free, I want to follow you. By your Spirit, I choose door number 2. Amen.


(The song’s title is Sweetly Broken by Jeremy Riddle and it is an awesome song!)